WEDNESDAY JUNE 30
In Cincinnati it’s common knowledge that certain types of people get profiled by the police; UC basketball players, for instance, get in trouble for as little as accidentally discharging a gun on campus even if it doesn’t hit anyone. That doesn’t mean local sports types took kindly to recent comments by ESPN writer Ric Bucher regarding the unfair treatment of athletes by Cincinnati police.
Enquirer sports reporter Joe Reedy today pointed out that
local athletes during recent years have been cited in many different
jurisdictions and states, a trend that proves both police fairness and
an open mind by athletes regarding where and when they choose to get
buck wild. The report also explained a Kentucky officer’s recent
decision to jail Reds player Brandon Phillips for speeding because he
yelled “Go Reds!” instead of handing over his insurance card.
THURSDAY JULY 1
Cincinnati City Councilman Chris Monzel is an expert in several fields: Dude has a master’s degree in engineering and lived in Mount Adams long enough to know the difference between a sinus infection and an unhealthy interest in doing blasters in the bathroom. One thing he never picked up on, however, is the competition the city faces for visitors, as his recent opposition to raising parking meter fees downtown was based on the fact that there’s free parking at Kenwood Towne Centre.
The increase passed 5-4, despite
the minority’s fears of a mass exodus up I-71, raising the cost of
one-hour parking to $2 downtown and 50 cents elsewhere. The revenue is
expected to help pay for renovations to downtown garages and stronger
plexiglass on meters so they don’t break when people punch them after
getting a ticket.
FRIDAY JULY 2
You know what’s nice? Having a first
place hometown baseball team.
SATURDAY JULY 3
If you were to ask Americans how it makes them feel to be compared to the Roman Empire, most would say something along the lines of, “That’s what’s up.” (People from Colerain would likely add an expletive to the end as well.) Such feelings of pride are not what Republican U.S. Senate nominee Rand Paul meant to conjure when he recently compared America to the Romans, because he thinks we’re an empire on the verge of collapse.
Paul today described to a group of
costume-wearing freaks tea party
supporters the ways the Roman emperor distracted his people from
economic turmoil with free bread and circus entertainment, only to have a
fringe political party ruin his plans weakened economy slowly bring down society.
SUNDAY JULY 4
Local residents who are proud of their
country spent today enjoying what’s great about America: its embrace of
holiday drinking and blowing stuff up in the name of freedom. But even
the most patriotic of local amateur pyrotechnicians was slightly alarmed
to read The Enquirer’s list of top stories early in the day,
which included such reports as “The American dream is real,” “Man found
stabbed in Middletown,” “Anything is possible here” and “Harrison teen
dies in crash.” Online commenters appeared annoyed at the imposition of
bad news on their Independence Day, though most forgot once they
realized they hadn’t checked the weekend DUI checkpoint locations and
made the requisite changes to their driving routes.
MONDAY JULY 5
Those of us with white skin who have
experienced the reaction of a public school teacher to a T-shirt
brandishing the image of a dog biting a man’s penis along with the words
“Fucking shit man!” understand how harsh teachers can be (getting sent
to the bathroom to turn it inside out was waaay embarrassing). A new
study suggests that a black kid might suffer a harsher penalty for such a
stunt, as the state’s 17 percent of public school students who are
black make up 74 percent of its disciplinary actions. The report states
that the unequal penalization of black students occurs in suburban and
rural schools as well as urban districts, though it did note that
quoting lyrics by Lil’ Jon & the Eastside Boyz has proven to get
kids suspended no matter what race they are.
TUESDAY JULY 6
If there’s one thing that irks a county judge, it’s a person in his or her courtroom with a thug mentality. And even though the term “thug mentality” offers no real meaning, an Enquirer story that used the cliche today offered other information that was actually interesting. Hamilton County judges are considering a ban on cell phones inside courtrooms due to the many ways they can interfere with the criminal justice process, from witnesses texting each other during a trial to jurors and witnesses having their pictures taken as a means of intimidation.
Critics of the proposed ban say it’s important
for people watching the more boring trials to have other forms of
entertainment and that courtroom sketches are actually more accurate
than a lot of cell phone cameras anyway.
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