Anyone who knows me well will tell you that I’m an avid dog-lover. I’ve owned dogs from the time I was a young teen, and I’ve loved every moment of it. There’s something about our canine companions that just warms my heart. Their wagging tails, their wet noses, the way they’re always happy to see you when you come home ... I just love them.

Unfortunately, it seems like not all people in this world share the same passion for dogs that I do. Hundreds upon thousands of dogs are abandoned each year and end up either dead or in shelters, and many more suffer at the hands of neglectful or abusive owners. Fortunately, we have organizations such as the SPCA around to speak out and help these animals. However, it’s recently come to my attention that not all shelters treat certain breeds of dogs the same.

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I guess it was only a matter of time. The Shit Girls Say viral phenomenon has sparked hundreds of knock-offs: Shit Black Guys Say, Shit Girls Say to Gay Guys, Shit Nobody Says are among my favorites. Now, we have our own.

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It's two weeks until Valentine's Day, and we've got a few suggestions on how to celebrate.

To women, nothing says ‘I Love You’ quite like a big, fat cockroach on Valentine’s Day. That's right, for just $10, you can name a special bug living at the Bronx Zoo after your sweetie - because like love, a cockroach is indestructible.

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Winter is here. Not quite the bitter cold but no longer the brutal heat wave Cincinnati was treated to during the middle months. A nice enough night to appreciate not having to be at work, servicing the needs of diners. As I approach the steel gates I show the doorman my ID even though I’ve been here dozens of times before, but he’s never seen me. He’s only ever seen a cheeky smile in a photograph and a birthdate. As I walk in I scoff at the hunky metrosexuals crowding the entrance still toting tank tops and skinny jeans, slurping tallboys of whatever while they talk nonsense. The bartender knows my face so he promptly pays mind to me. Tonight I’ll start with and probably stick with bourbon, neat. “Bulleit?” he asks. He knows my face too well.

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Santa Claus is coming to town a little early this year. SantaCon kicks off at noon Saturday, when Santas of all sorts will gather on Fountain Square, then disperse around the city, singing, passing out candy and bringing holiday cheer to area bars and restaurants. To participate, email santa@cincinnatisantacon.com and follow @CincySantacon on Twitter to find them around town.

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Hold on to your knickers, girls! This weekend is full of excellent music, arts, theater and shopping events. Here we go:

Ides of March premiers tonight (FINALLY). Check it out and see how many Cincinnati landmarks you can spot. Or just look at Ryan Gosling. Read our interview with an actor who is not Gosling or Clooney here, and check out our review.

Clifton Heights Music Festival is back for its fifth installment! Bands of all genres take over six Clifton-area bars (in walking distance of one another) tonight and Saturday. The ever-growing fest continues to be one of the most affordable - $8 gets you in all venues for one night, $12 for both nights. Go here for the full lineup and venue details.

Rapper Machine Gun Kelly plays Madison Theater tonight. My little sister wants to marry him. Important facts here.

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Broken Social Scene is on indefinite hiatus. Band leader Kevin Drew told The Huffington Post, "This is the healthiest thing we can do. There's no bad blood, no problems, everyone is at peace. We've had a lot of inter-relationships, some have worked, some haven't. But we all loved what we were doing. And I think we we're always fair."

Work it out, guys! We love you together.

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Oktoberfest Zinzinnati is taking over downtown this weekend, bringing around 500,000 guests! Once you've had your fill of schnitzel, Spaten and sauerkraut, stop by the CityBeat booth for the official Oktoberfest guide and register for a VIP MPMF Package and other prizes.

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Charlie Sheen has proudly taken all of our money after watching his public meltdown, shitty comic routines and buying his stupid T-shirts.

Sheen on Thursday told Jay Leno that he was actually "losing" during his breakdown and that he "thought I could come back … kind of like you did." Sheen says that he has no grudge against the producers of Two and a Half Menand that "I'd have fired my ass, too." He even said that if he were to meet new member of the cast Ashton Kutcher, he'd "just give him a hug and say, 'Make me proud, dude.' "

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Eighties mall girl-turned-pop star-turned-Playboy pin-up Tiffany swings through Hollywood Casino's Boogie Nights club Saturday!

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