Dear Cincinnati Reds:

I recently attended a baseball game between the Reds and the Pittsburgh Pirates at Great American Ballpark. I don’t usually go to your stadium to watch the games live because walking across Fort Washington Way and looking at the Pepsi Smokestacks in the outfield kind of make me hate being there. I don’t mind the Mountain Dew bottles racing each other on the scoreboard or how Mr. Red always loses the Skyline Chili race because he is too tempted by a 3-Way to finish the competition. That guy’s lack of dedication kills me every time.

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Not a lot of time, and nothing much to say. Sometimes, that's just how it goes. Perhaps I'm too pissed at Chien Ming Wang. I don't know if my fantasy league is punishing pitchers too much or if Mr. Wang has truly been that bad (I suspect he has), but to get -20 points or worse for his first two outings is, as Charles Barkley would say, "Turble."

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Do we really care what happens in the American League outside of individual players’ impact on our fantasy baseball teams? Probably not. But in the name of being thorough, the following is CityBeat’s prediction of the entire softball-style AL. We even looked up a couple guys who play for the Royals, just to be fair.

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It's the time of year to act like you know what's going to happen in baseball this season, because you are smart. Usually, most of the picks you make will be wrong, but such is life. I doubt I will end up forecasting a Royals vs. Pirates World Series ... or that a team will sign Barry Bonds.

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Fantasy sports bring out the worst in me, and that's why it is with great excitement that I tell the two losers who regularly read my illustrious column that my fantasy sports franchise, Hoagy Time Ltd., will be throwing it's hat in the ring and entering the rarified air of fantasy baseball this year.

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Another week of sports stories has washed ashore with some (like something or other about Alex Rodriguez but not the Kabbalah) sure to ring through our ears and eyes, ad nauseum like the Brett Favre Retirement Spectacle of last year.

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I can't go on writing "The Reds should sign (insert free agent's name here)” blogs much longer. Pitchers and catchers report soon enough, and who the Reds sign, if anyone, isn't likely to be a very big-time move.

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This year’s free agent market has been extremely slow in developing, and there are still big-name guys waiting to find out where they fit in. The opportunity is ripe for a team like the Reds, with a little cash to spend, to find a rare deal. But the Reds are a weird team right now, and it’s been difficult to figure out what would be a good move, even if it comes for less than market value.

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Thinking it over, Manny probably wouldn't be too stoked on coming to Cincinnati once he realized that the number of decent sushi places can be counted on the fingers of one hand. His casual, laid back demeanor may or may not encourage the core of the Reds team to approach the game with the true sense of urgency that is necessary to win consistently at the Major League level. Maybe Manny and the Dodgers smooth things out, and their Hollywood relationship splashes across the front page of newspapers out there for the next few years.

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Now that the Rays have signed Pat Burrell maybe my pipe dream of Rocco Baldelli launching home runs off the Batter's Eye Pavilion in center field becomes a bit less improbable.

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