Grass is officially the greatest idea ever. It's a "crafty carnival circus party" where you can see how talented and creative your friends are.

Be proud of them and of Cincinnati. Buy things. Drink beer. Eat pizza. Watch some flicks. And dance to the Lions Rampant and DJ INDIANgiver.

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It’s 6:30 a.m. Friday morning. I find myself staring into my reflection at the Econo Lodge’s employees-only lobby bathroom watching blood pour from my nose and drip all over the sink, diffusing into the water and I ask myself, “How did I get here?” Looking to the floor I admire still more of my blood, peppered across the white tile. I feel scandalous.

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So here it is, Friday night and I'm opting to stay in to write. Let's get retroactive.

Last night, Wednesday night, we visited Levi's and FADER magazine's FORT (don't ask me what it stands for) tent to watch B.O.B. and Little Boots. I don't know either of them but they were modestly entertaining. More than modestly entertaining was the free booze with zero lines. My initial thoughts, after waiting for 20 minutes to get our event passes (Pete, Mandy and Josh were all somehow on the guestlist. Me, just a plus-one), are that I have never seen so many hipsters, wannabes, rockers, douchebags and photojournalists ever in my entire life. In one place. Not even Williamsburg can really compete.

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A little over 24 hours ago, when I am telling my mother I am headed to Austin to film several showcases with Cincinnati's own PROJECTMILL at SXSW, I tell her my idea for the name of my blog for "The Morning After" would more or less be titled "Ostentatious." In a lowered voice, she questions the originality of the idea. Touche, Mom, touche.

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The lovely people at PROJECTMILL filmed the Cinciditarod. If you missed the race, check out this footage.

Have you seen this yet? Thousands of conceited women with eating disorders almost killed each other at an America's Next Top Model audition in New York.

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That's right folks, the Cinciditarod. It's a sporting event that cleverly combines the words "Cincinnati" and "Iditarod," as well as the meanings of both. The Cinciditarod is sort of like the grueling 1,100-mile Alaskan dog-sled race, except that it's held in Cincinnati, without dogs, with shopping carts instead of sleds and the course is only five miles. No big.

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Ever had a bad one-night stand? Sure, we all have. But I mean like really, really bad? Like the kind of bad where the guy called out his own name or tried to pee on you or wanted you to dress up like Hannah Montana?

Out the dude and warn other women here.

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So this hasn't officially happened to me yet, but my mom's best friend from high school joined when he became single again and he tells her what my status updates are. BTW my mom doesn't really know what "status update" means. She doesn't even understand what Facebook is.

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�Click the photo for Kevin Bayer and Matthew Luken's pictures from Dance_MF.