Morning/Evening News and Stuff

U.S. Rep. Paul Ryan said on Monday that Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich does not fully understand the GOP proposal to turn Medicare into a voucher system. Ryan has received criticism from the former House Speaker that the plan would be a radical change. "I just think he's missing the mark on what our plan actually does," said Ryan after a speech to the Economic Club of Chicago. "Our plan is one of the most gradual things one could do," because it would not affect people over age 55 and would not kick in for 10 years and there’s little chance of it affecting Newt whatsoever so what’s he complaining about?—-

Mitt Romney on Monday raised $10.25 million during a phone bank fundraiser held in Las Vegas. Romney reportedly wants to raise $50 million for the GOP primary. For the 2008 presidential election, Barack Obama raised $730 million, John McCain raised $330 million and Bob Barr (ne’er heard of ‘em) raised $1 million. In the meantime, Eli Samuel Johnson has decided to quit his post as an intern and run for president. All cash or check donations will be accepted.

Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel, who was just sworn in yesterday, has already vowed to make some big changes. Rahm says that his Chicago is no longer “Beirut by the lake.”

International Monetary Fund Chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn is set to spend the night in Rikers Island while he awaits trial for an alleged sex attack. Reports say the he’s going to make the best of it and get Bob Saget’s autograph. No one has told him that Saget was only making a guest appearance on Law and Order: SVU and was not actually convicted of a crime.

After separating from his wife Maria Shriver, Arnold Schwarzenegger has acknowledged that he did in fact father a child with Danny DeVito in Twins a member of his household staff. "After leaving the governor's office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago,” Schwarzenegger said in a statement. "I understand and deserve the feelings of anger and disappointment among my friends and family. There are no excuses and I take full responsibility for the hurt I have caused. I have apologized to Maria, my children and my family. I am truly sorry.”

Schwarzenegger denies that the child is Justin Bieber.