Comedy: Mike Armstrong

“I like doing comedy,” says cop-turned-comic Mike Armstrong. “I get shot at less, too. People don’t shoot at comedians like they do at the police.” And, yes, he was funny cop too. “I’d constantly pull (drivers) over and warn them about speed traps … just to see their faces.” He gives another example. “On the expressway where it says, ‘Authorized Vehicles Only,’ people make u-turns,” he explains. “I’d pull up behind them, put on my lights, then I’d go over my intercom, ‘I authorize you.’ I used to do stuff like that all the time.” On stage Armstrong likes to say things he thinks other people are thinking but are too polite to say so. Inspirations run the gambit from work to family, with a fair amount of embellishment. “My son just graduated from high school,” he says. “He’s going to college at the University of Texas. He’s very smart. (On stage) I make him sound like he’s lazy. I say, ‘I don’t know what I’m going to do with him. He wants to be a garbage man because they only work one day week.’ ” Armstrong performs Thursday-Sunday at Go Bananas Thursday-Sunday. $10-$15. Get showtimes, tickets and find nearby bars and restaurants here.