Many of us have had to come to terms with the fact that the Ohio River is not an ocean. And no matter how many Jimmy Buffett tailgate parties you attend, Cincinnati will not transform into Siesta Key. But these bars are doing their best impression of laid-back beach hangouts with Tiki drinks, volleyball and even some waterside lounging.
Japp’s Since 1879
Japp’s transforms from a craft cocktail lounge to an island getaway on the first Wednesday of each month for Tiki Night. Jeremy Harrison, bartender, musician and one of Tiki Night’s founders, spins ’80s New Wave/Punk Rock dance jams throughout the night and serves up surf-ready drink staples. An homage to authentic Caribbean/Polynesian libations, expect complex and potent rum-based cocktails with a balance of sweet, sour, spice and a fruity or floral garnish. 1134 Main St., Over-the-Rhine, facebook.com/japps1879.
Northside Yacht Club
A loosely nautically themed and ironically landlocked Rock club from two local music and mixology veterans, the Northside Yacht Club is all fun. The cocktails — served by tattooed bartenders in the vein of Sailor Jerry — are masterful, made with fresh juice, fruit and herbal garnish. The tropically themed and navy-inspired drinks are served in Tiki glasses, but boat with caution if you order the Volcano Bowl. This punch comes with a highly potent mix of many, many rums, grenadine and pineapple and orange juice — all lit on fire and served with four straws. Lay down a base layer with a bar-food menu that features satisfying items like house-smoked wings, duck fat poutine and vegan lentil chili fries. 4231 Spring Grove Ave., Northside, northsideyachtclub.com.
Ludlow Bromley Yacht Club
With a giant shark figurine impaled on the sign, this bar, grill and marina has a definite sense of laid-back island humor — and cheap drinks. People might go for the irony, river views and glowing palm trees, but they stay for the grill-your-own steaks, live music and Tiki drinks served in Styrofoam cups. 860 Elm St., Ludlow, ludlowbromleyyacht.club.
Cabana on the River
Cabana on the River is a breezy, no frills (paper plates!) Tiki bar tucked away on some prime riverfront real estate on the West Side. The large and varied menu has plenty of options for everyone, including items like a Black & Bleu California Steak Salad, gourmet grilled cheese and Caribbean fish tacos. Cabana on the River also has a full bar and lots of bar seating. Drink specials are mostly rum-based with an island vibe, and they have an updated, large selection of premium, local and craft beers. Check out live music every weekend under their glowing neon palm trees. 7445 Forbes Road, Delhi, cabanaontheriver.com.
The Sandbar
With seven volleyball courts and a view of the river, tap into your inner beach bum with a list of “Dock”Tails, including the Strawberry Colada with Malibu rum, peach schnapps, frozen piña colada and strawberry purée. If you don’t want to join a volleyball league, the bar hosts open play pickup games on Saturday and Sunday. Four Seasons Marina, 4609 Kellogg Ave., California, thesandbarcincinnati.com.
Knotty Pine Rock Club & Tiki Bar
This Cheviot mainstay is all Rock club/pool hall inside and all beach vibes outside, as the one-eyed-pirate-meets-biker skull logo can attest. The outdoor Tiki bar abuts a sand volleyball court, with competitive and co-ed league play throughout the summer and daily happy hour from 3-7 p.m. 6947 Cheviot Road, Cheviot, knottypinerocks.com.
