Minimum Gauge: Nursing Home Escapees Found at Heavy Metal Festival

Two men who escaped from a nursing home were later found at 3 a.m. at a huge German Metal fest; Every Time I Die steals the show at the final Vans Warped Tour concert; Vampire Weekend make the most of Lollapalooza weekend.

Aug 6, 2018 at 5:21 pm

click to enlarge "Frank, if I miss ONE note of Cannibal Corpse because you had to stop and pee six times in the past hour, I'm going to rip your colon out." - Photo: Jonathan Farber
Photo: Jonathan Farber
"Frank, if I miss ONE note of Cannibal Corpse because you had to stop and pee six times in the past hour, I'm going to rip your colon out."

HOT: Heavy Escape

Besides that goat flash-mob that infested a Boise suburb, the other feel-good summertime story to emerge this week took place in Germany, where two elderly men’s very big adventure came to an end at an unexpected locale. The men had “escaped” their nursing home and made their way to a huge Heavy Metal music festival in Wacken, Germany, which featured performers like Cannibal Corpse, Children of Bodom, Judas Priest and Sepultura. Police reportedly found the men on fest grounds at 3 a.m. on the Friday night of the event. A police spokesperson said they appeared to have enjoyed themselves at the festival, but it’s still unclear if attending was their intention or how they ended up at the concert. But don’t worry, it will all be revealed in the inevitable motion picture starring Christopher Plummer and Michael Caine.

WARM: A Warped Farewell

The last notes played at the final show on the last-ever Vans Warped Tour were by surprise guests Pennywise, a promise fest founder Kevin Lyman said he made years ago. But at the show on Aug. 5 in West Palm Beach, Fla., the most striking image came from guitarist Jordan Buckley of metallers Every Time I Die, who stood center stage after his band finished its set and continued to riff solo for several minutes as the road crew dismantled the stage around him. Buckley said he wanted to keep going so he'd be the final musician to perform at Warped but he got the hook and Pennywise beat him.

COLD: VW’s Viral Comeback

Indie Pop faves Vampire Weekend have been silent as of late, but they more than made up for it over Lollapalooza weekend. During its headlining set, the band broke music news by revealing that its anticipated fourth album is finished (it's the group's first for Columbia Records), then reportedly played several of the new tracks at an after-Lolla VW club show — not live, but through singer Ezra Koenig’s phone, which he ran through the club’s P.A. system. The band also made sure to ensure some viral traction — the group opened its Lolla show by playing its biggest song, “A-Punk” three times in a row without explanation, then offered a bass-solo cover of the Seinfeld theme song.