Like many of my righteous forefathers, I found a loophole in the system that allowed me to put a positive, self-indulgent spin on an otherwise cumbersome religious tradition. If people would just do a little bit more soul-searching, then they'd see that Lent could be a hell of a lot of fun. I dread Easter when I have to give up giving everything up. Until then, pass me that bottle of ?Praise be to God.?
Click Here to Hear "Giving Up Lent"
Giving Up Lent
I like chocolate, I like ice cream I like hot cocoa with a lot of whoop cream I like wine by the bottle, I like beer by the mug But I hate the time of year when I'm supposed to give'm up Lent, lent, I hate your guts I get a good thing going, then you screw it all up After 40 long days, I always feel spent So this year for Lent, I'm giving up Lent
Hot fudge sundae, brownies by the dozen Would I like extra chocolate sauce? Lord, keep it coming. I like sprinkles and cherries and all sorts of nuts And I'll eat'm guilt free cuz I gave up giving em up Lent, Lent, I hate your guts I get a good thing going, then you screw it all up But I got an idea, I think it's Heaven sent This year for Lent, I'm giving up Lent
Pass me a cigarette, pass a cigar Then pass me the pint of whiskey in the jar If the Pope ain't Catholic, then I ain't drunk I know drinking is a sin, but I gave not sinning up Lent, Lent, I'm liking you more I got a good thing going in the name of the Lord For 40 fast days I'll feel content This year for Lent, I'm giving up Lent.