The Ultimate Season Shattered

The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Unfortunately for me, I don't have a Lenny Small around to shoot and blame for the things that went wrong.

On Saturday I was fixin' to play some Tecmo SuperBowl with my homies when I noticed the red light on the 'Tendo flashing on and off, which to a certain demographic of American males automatically means that any saved progress you had stored in that little gray box has surely scattered to the four winds.—-

Gone … Not here anymore … Not around … Four weeks of games … down the drain … A complete loss of all saved data.

Somehow maybe we pissed Tecmo off by trying to record its every movement, habit and tendency. Who knows? All I know is that a little piece of me died when it happened. I felt like I was putting something in a shoebox, lining the inside with blankets and burying it in the backyard. I guess it's better that this monumental data loss occurred in Week 4 … than, say, any week after that.

It still sucks though. Things were really starting to come around. I was so distraught that I lost to Danny Cross when he came over and lied to us about the Bearcats playing basketball that day. I didn't get to see the game Sunday, but still struggle to understand how UC lost by so much. Basically, as I feared, the world can be a cruel place where everything you've been working for can be smashed on the floor, swept up and put into a trash can. Even your feelings.

All we wanted to do was play every game of the season and see what teams did best and who ended up in the Super Bowl, featuring the Mighty Bombjacks Halftime Show. It's easy to say, "The Nintendo is 21 years old. I guess you can't expect it to not F up."

I don't know what precautions can be taken in the future to increase the likelihood of preserving the season's saved data. The Nintendo is a moody machine, prone to anger. I wonder if we bubble wrapped it what would happen. I guess you can't just pack it in and give up on everything that goes the opposite of the way you wanted it to. All that there is left to do is pick the controller back up and run downhill and guess the play you think your opponent is going to use.

Life goes on.

However, I still fear that we have pissed Tecmo off for the above-stated reasons and that completion of a season in the manner previously described is not going to be easily accomplished. It also won't happen soon, if at all.

Although I am upset about what has transpired, at least I am now contemplating feigning a religious affiliation in order to please Tecmo and trick it into letting us complete what would be The Ultimate Season.

Thank you kindly.

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