This Week in Questionable Decisions…
1. At a rally in Tampa, Fla., Trump rationalized voter I.D. laws by comparing them to needing a photo identification to buy groceries, which…isn’t a thing, right? Proof that our president has never shopped for groceries.
2. Steven Seagal has been appointed as Russia’s special representative to the U.S. in an effort to improve relations between the two countries.
3. America’s Sweetheart Alex Jones is counter-suing Sandy Hook parents — who filed a defamation claim against Jones for, you know, saying their kid’s death was a hoax — for $100,000 in court fees.
4. A stand-in on the set of a new Seth Rogen movie was out in blackface for a scene. Even worse, this is apparently a more common practice than you’d think.
5. Blac Chyna’s 19-year-old boyfriend refers to himself as her “oldest son.”
6. Vampire Weekend kicked off their Lollapalooza set by playing their song “A-Punk.” Three times. In a row.
7. Virginia House Democratic candidate Leslie Cockburn claimed that her opponent, Republican Denver Riggleman, is a “devotee of Bigfoot erotica.” What, like it’s a bad thing?
8. Michael Douglas’ teen daughter told Town & Country that she once thought her father was a professional pancake maker. I’m more shocked by the idea that she thought pancake maker was an actual career than that she had no idea her dad is a famous actor.
9. Two senior citizens duked it out over free cheese samples at a South Carolina Costco.
10. Is there such thing as being too green? Yes. The Centers for Disease Control apparently felt the need to remind folks not to reuse condoms.
11. “Florida Man” strikes again! Sunshine state resident Robby Stratton was caught on video at a Jacksonville liquor store holding an alligator and chasing customers around with it. He later told reporters that he had no memory of the incident or any idea where the gator came from.