Your Weekend To Do List (7/17-7/19)

Seinfeld, Wet Hot American Summer, a pork and whiskey festival, rescheduled Paddlefest, Wild for Pets and more

click to enlarge Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry Seinfeld

FRIDAY COMEDY: JERRY SEINFELD AT THE ARONOFF Yada, yada, yada, y’all. Jerry Seinfeld, comedy icon and everybody’s favorite sitcom star who helmed a TV show about nothing, is coming to Cincinnati to perform his signature stand-up at the Aronoff for one night only, drawing on his uncanny ability to find sharp humor in ordinary observations. Feel free to break out your urban sombrero and/or puffy pirate shirt. Due to demand, Seinfeld will be performing two back-to-back sets. 7 and 9:30 p.m. Friday. $49-$150. Aronoff Center, 650 Walnut St., Downtown, cincinnatiarts.org.


Bike Night
Photo: Provided
EVENT: GOODS PRESENTS BIKE NIGHT
Adventure is out there, and it turns out it’s closer than you’d think. GOODS on Main, a thematic retail store currently serving up “Adventure,” is calling all bike-curious folks to come together on Final Friday and celebrate everything that runs on two wheels. Whether it’s bikes, mopeds, scooters, café racers or cruisers, GOODS digs it just as much as you do. Bites from Tiger Dumpling Co. and local beer will be provided, as well as T-shirts created exclusively for Bike Night. 5-10 p.m. Friday. Free. 1300 Main St., Over-the-Rhine, facebook.com/goodsonmain.

Shakespeare in the Park
Photo: Provided
ONSTAGE: SHAKESPEARE IN THE PARK
Make your midsummer night a dream and experience the Bard in the great outdoors this summer as Cincinnati Shakespeare Company stages Romeo & Juliet and A Midsummer Night’s Dream throughout Tristate parks. The full-length plays shalt show at Washington Park, President’s Park, Linden Grove Cemetery and 20 others. All productions are free, beginning with Romeo & Juliet on July 31 at Seasongood Pavilion in Eden Park. Doth go — all the world’s a stage, but an actual stage is even better, especially when it’s in a park. Through Sept. 4; shows start at 7 p.m. unless otherwise noted. Free. Various locations, cincyshakes.com.

ART: LIKENESS AT 1305 GALLERY
For Main Street’s Final Friday at 1305 Gallery, photographer and installation artist Molly Donnermeyer — who also runs Live(In) Gallery in Brighton — and poet/visual artist Sidney Cherie Hilley joined forces to create an exhibition entitled Likeness, in which they investigate themes related to one’s internal relationship to their external physical realities. For Main Street’s Final Friday at 1305 Gallery, photographer and installation artist Molly Donnermeyer — who also runs Live(In) Gallery in Brighton — and poet/visual artist Sidney Cherie Hilley joined forces to create an exhibition entitled Likeness, in which they investigate themes related to one’s internal relationship to their external physical realities. 6-11 p.m. Friday. Free. 1305 Main St., Over-the-Rhine, facebook.com/1305Gallery.

ONSTAGE: HUNDRED DAYS
Fasten your seat belt — here comes the 2015-2016 theater season. Know Theatre gets bragging rights for being first out of the local theater gate with Hundred Days, a Rock & Roll show it played a significant part in developing. The Folk Rock odyssey was created by and features the husband-and-wife duo of Shaun and Abigail Bengson. It premiered at Z Space in San Francisco in February 2014.Hundred Days is the story of Sarah and Will, who fall in love only to have their time together cut tragically short by a fatal illness. Their romantic, defiant response to their fate: Compress the 60 years they had envisioned together into the 100 days they have left. Kate E. Ryan assembled the script for this powerful piece, which is an unconventional musical, Indie Rock opera and tragic romance. Read more about Hundred Days here. Hundred Days runs at Know Theatre July 24 to Aug. 22. knowtheatre.com.

TV: WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER: FIRST DAY OF CAMP

Contrary to earlier reports, the Wet Hot prequel series premieres this week. Tune in to discover what Coop, Katie, Andy, Beth, Gene and the rest of the Camp Firewood crew were up to before that final day of camp depicted in the 2001 original flick. Premieres on Netflix.



SATURDAY
Swear and Shake
Photo: via Facebook
EVENT: THE PORKOPOLIS PIG & WHISKEY FESTIVAL
Saturday, CityBeat is partnering with Horseshoe Casino to bring all of the Queen City’s best barbecue offerings to one place for a day of pork, beer and whiskey at the inaugural Porkopolis Pig & Whiskey Festival. Restaurants, including Eli’s, Velvet Smoke, Barrio Tequileria and Huit Craft BBQ, will be featured, along with more than 40 varieties of bourbon, scotch and whiskey, with master distillers and a whiskey chatter area for education and sampling. Grub to the sounds of live Bluegrass and Americana bands playing at the top of every hour, with local and national acts including Young Heirlooms, Magnolia Mountain and headliners Swear and Shake. Proceeds benefit the Bow Tie Foundation. 11 a.m.- 9 p.m. Saturday. Free; food and liquor prices vary. 1000 Broadway St., Pendelton, citybeat.com

EVENT: SALMON SWIM OF OTR
The Salmon Shorts of OTR is basically a Facebook page dedicated to posting photos of people in salmon-colored shorts in Over-the-Rhine, poking a bit of fun at the preppy clientele who now visit the gentrified bars and restaurants of the urban neighborhood. Salmon shorts: good for golfing as well as drinking at Rhinegeist. Saturday’s Salmon Swim features a pub crawl to Taft’s Ale House, Washington Park Platform, Lachey’s and Neons, where those with wristbands receive drink specials and other treats, like oysters on the half shell from Anchor OTR at Neons, plus live entertainment from Cincinnati songstress Jess Lamb. Proceeds benefit the Greater Cincinnati Homeless Coalition. Obviously, you are encouraged to wear salmon shorts. 4-8 p.m. Saturday. $5 wristbands. Salmon Shorts of OTR is searchable on Facebook.

Wild About Pets Festival
Photo: Steve Ziegelmeyer
EVENT: WILD ABOUT PETS AT JUNGLE JIM'S
Jungle Jim’s is known by many as an amusement park for food — a well-deserved moniker — but on Saturday it will turn into an amusement park for pets during their Wild About Pets Festival. More than 20 vendors will be offering free samples and coupons for their wares, and several pet experts (like a trainer, holistic vet and groomer) will be on site to answer any questions you may have about the health and wellness of your furry friends. They’re also featuring face painting, a petting zoo, pet and people caricatures, and cat and dog toy making, in addition to dozens of animals available for adoption. Cats, dogs and birds are welcome — but maybe keep your pet Komodo dragon at home. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Saturday. $4; $1 children. Jungle Jim’s, 5440 Dixie Highway, Fairfield, junglejims.com/wildforpets.

Meridith Benson and Martin Roosaare in 'Giselle'
Photo: Rich Sofranko 
DANCE: DE LA DANCE COMPANY 10TH ANNIVERSARY
Aside from those who become marketable marquee stars, it’s not all that common for dancers to find a sustainable living in their art form. Or long-term romance. Or family. It’s a hard-knock life, being a dancer.  But through talent, hard work and astute planning, Meridith Benson, former Cincinnati Ballet and Joffrey Ballet of Chicago principal, and Mario de la Nuez, former Cincinnati Ballet dancer and Artistic Director of Ballet Theater of Chicago, have made a dream come true. Read more about the couple here. De la Dance Company celebrates its 10th anniversary with an open house Saturday at de la Arts Place. More info: deladancecompany.org; delaartsplace.com. 

MUSIC: LEBANON BLUES FESTIVAL
Sometimes the cure to the summertime blues is, well, more Blues. The Lebanon Blues Festival has just the thing, offering a free event with eight Blues bands, food, a car and motorcycle show, and a deluxe beer garden at their historic downtown location. After listening to some slow-burning Blues from bands like Brown Street Breakdown and Donahoe, Sowders & Cole, you can speed it up with the Red Hot Blues Run, a 5k, 10k and 15k for kids and adults. The run isn’t free, but proceeds will go toward the city’s parks. 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Saturday. Free. Downtown Lebanon, lebanonbluesfestival.org.

Rich Robinson
Photo: Alysse Gafjken
MUSIC: RICH ROBINSON
Rich Robinson formed The Black Crowes when he was 17 with his older brother Chris, launching a group that would become a foundational band of “modern Classic Rock” radio (listen to almost any Classic Rock outlet for an hour and you will most definitely hear a Crowes song). Though the band has broken up before, Robinson announced at the start of this year that the Crowes were done for good (later statements by his longtime bandmates confirmed the assertion). But the guitarist/songwriter isn’t done with music — in 2014, he released his third solo album, the widely acclaimed The Ceaseless Sight. The album has the same rootsy swagger as some of the Crowes’ best work (and is indicative of how integral Rich was to the band’s sound), but it also showcases the artist’s lesser-known talents as a solid singer and strong lyricist. Robinson has toured previously with a full-on backing band, but his visit to our area this weekend is a part of his “(mostly) acoustic” tour. The show will be just Robinson and one of a handful of vintage guitars he’s bringing with him, performing songs from his three solo releases, as well as a few covers — maybe some Bob Dylan and definitely some vintage Folk Blues. 9 p.m. Saturday. $15; $20 day of show. Southgate House Revival (Sanctuary), 111 E. Sixth St., Newport, Ky., southgatehouse.com. 

SUNDAY
Global Water Dances
Photo: Provided
EVENT: GLOBAL WATER DANCES AT PADDLEFEST
A safe, clean, accessible and sustainable water supply is essential for communities around the world. Global Water Dances-Cincinnati showcases the vision and choreography of legendary Fanchon Shur, an Ohio Governor's Woman of the Year, set to original World Beat music composed by event director Shari Lauter, MEd. Dancers and musicians pay homage to the Ohio River as a historic gateway to freedom from slavery, and Cincinnati's source of drinking water, with a call from children to safeguard water for future generations. Occurring amid rescheduled Paddlefest activities — canceled in June because of high water — the performance takes place along the Serpentine Wall, with a backdrop of hundreds of Paddlefest kayakers viewing from the river. The Paddle the Ohio River Paddle canoe and kayak race begins at 7:30 a.m. Sunday at Coney Island (last boat leaves at 9 a.m.). The race ends at Yeatman’s Cove with a finish-line festival until 1:30 p.m., which includes the Global Water Dances performance. Global Water Dances: 11 a.m. Sunday. Free. Serpentine Wall, Sawyer Point, 705 E. Pete Rose Way, Downtown, facebook.com/globalwaterdances-cincinnati, ohioriverpaddlefest.org/paddlefest.

MainStrasse Village Classic Car Show
EVENT: MAINSTRASSE VILLAGE CLASSIC CAR SHOW
Drive back in time to MainStrasse Village for their 13th-annual Classic Car Show. Hot Rods, customs and classics will be parked along the tree-lined streets and walkways of the village and Goebel Park, filling an already scenic route with even more of a historic view. Whether you’re a lover of cars or simply like a vintage product, pop into or check out the neighborhood’s eclectic shops, businesses, pubs, and eateries. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Sunday. Free. MainStrasse Village, Sixth St., Covington, Ky., mainstrasse.org.

Mike Stanley
Photo: Provided
COMEDY: MIKE STANLEY
“My parents were always really good about not censoring things,” says comedian Mike Stanley. “So I grew up watching a lot of stand-up comedy and I always knew it was something I could do.” Today he splits time between L.A. and his hometown of Detroit. “I would never get a hair transplant or plugs,” he tells an audience. “There’s always a recurring theme on all those hair-transplant commercials. As soon as those guys get new hair, they for some reason jump on a Jet Ski. Like you need hair to ride a Jet Ski. Like if you were balding and on vacation and tried to rent a Jet Ski the guy behind the counter would say, ‘No.’ ” Thursday-Sunday. $8-$14. Go Bananas, 8410 Market Place Lane, Montgomery, gobananascomedy.com.






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