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There’s a frustrated question that seems to cyclically pop up on the r/cincinnati subreddit: What can singles do to meet people?
Most answers encourage IRL means, from volunteering to contra dancing. But given the question’s repeated nature, it’s fair to observe that folks are finding modern dating challenging. And while it may be a problem for any locale in the digital age, maybe there’s just something about our region that makes it a little harder.
“ I think it can be really tough for people, especially if you’re from the outside, to break into new circles,” Leslie Deshler, a financial services professional, told CityBeat. “A lot of people grew up here, they come back here, they’re hanging out with their friends that they went to high school with.”
A year ago, following a move back from college, I found myself sailing in that very same singles boat. I wanted nothing to do with the apps, and I found no success with “putting myself out there” at bars and hobby groups.
So, on a different assignment for CityBeat, I offered my single self up to journalism and participated in a Date Cincy event. Date Cincy is one of the more entrenched in-person dating organizations in the region, hosting more than 20 annual mingle events targeted at singles in the 25-40 age range.
Following the highs and lows of a night of circulating in a bar crowded with singles (and an utter failure of a match), I called in-person mingles a “novelty” in my debrief. It’s 2026, and I’m starting to eat my words.
The Downfall of Swiping
After trying the apps, Deshler, like many other modern singles, was left wanting more from the default method of surfing through profiles.
“ I don’t think there’s anybody or many people who would say they wouldn’t just rather meet someone organically, right,” Deshler mused.
Just last December, Deshler founded LinkedUp Live, a mingling event intended for single professionals over 40 in the Greater Cincinnati area.
“As people start to get older, you find there are less single people in that age group,” Deshler explains, invoking life circumstances like previous marriages. “It might be harder. You don’t just walk into a bar that everybody’s gonna be single in your age range.”
In December, it hosted an event at Aviatra Incubator in Covington, followed by an after party at Second Story. While Deshler hasn’t yet heard specifically of any lasting connections made from this inaugural event, she still sees it as a success.
“ There were lots of interactions,” Deshler said. “I saw a lot of people connecting. It definitely didn’t have an awkward feeling to it. People were just happy to be there, happy to be involved.”
In an era of increasing frustration with digital facades, Logan Moore, one of Date Cincy’s founders, also sees value in the streamlined nature of in-person connections.
“ I think when you meet somebody in person, there’s that first connection,” Moore said, “you can kind of vibe out and suss out if there’s a connection.”
While co-founder Paige Braley thinks that authenticity can be a “buzzword” in the modern dating sphere, she still sees it as an important factor.
“ When they really do lean into what ‘authenticity’ actually means, I think that people immediately feel the sense of that guard coming down,” Braley said. “They truly do embrace the fact that they can genuinely show up as themselves and know that they are going to resonate with people who resonate with that version of themselves.”
It was a desire for more in-person connections that inspired Kelsey Ference to found Midwestern Lesbian. In her previous role as a member of Rhinegeists’s marketing team, she was tasked with creating weekly calendars for taproom happenings. She soon noticed a gap.
“ I found myself constantly searching for queer events to attend in my free time,” she said. “And I realized that there was a need for the community to easily find spaces where they can be with other queer people in person, because it’s difficult for queer people to meet each other outside of the internet, whether that’s dating or finding friends.”
Now, she and her partner, Caitlin Dunkley, run the Cincinnati-based organization, which curates “inclusive events and resources for LGBTQ+ individuals across the Midwest.” Midwestern Lesbian maintains a special focus on the sapphic community (while definitions vary, the organization describes “sapphic” as “An umbrella term for women and gender non-conforming individuals, who are attracted to women”).`
Among Queer Line Dancing, book swaps and posing classes, Midwestern Lesbian also hosts “Cuffing Season: A Sapphic Singles Night” and “Sapphic Speed Dating” events. In the latter, participants have 5 minute, prompt-based conversations with around 15-20 people.
”We don’t really have a specific lesbian bar in the Cincinnati area,” Ference said. “So we try to create those spaces for our community so sapphic people can meet other sapphic people, and also queer people can meet other queer people in a space that isn’t just a gay bar or a drag show.”
The speed dating format is also distinct for the conversation it inevitably spurs, as opposed to a free-for-all singles mixer.
“ When it’s just a mix-and-mingle kind of event, everybody’s on their own and has to have that bravery to go up to somebody and have a conversation,” Ference said. “Whereas if you’re put down sitting in front of this person, you’re gonna have a conversation with them no matter what.”
And for their mingle-based Sapphic Singles Nights, the organization utilizes Pinyada, an app designed for connecting people outside of the events they attend. Ference describes it as a blend of Eventbrite, Partiful and Hinge. At their last singles event, over 50 matches were made via Pinyada – and, in a context where jitters are completely natural, Pinyada is essentially the connective gift that keeps on giving.
“If you don’t have the courage or push or the time to talk to somebody that you wanted to talk to, you can connect with them through the app,” Ference said.
Yet no matter their format, it seems as these in-person singles events grow more popular, they’re also generating different positive results – intentionally or not.
Friend Zones
On the third floor of Igby’s downtown, above the ruckus of singles participating in a dance icebreaker below, I’m seated between Dan and Izzy.
Throughout the span of our interview, they politely reach over me to fist bump a total of three times. These two are essentially each other’s wingmen, who just so happened to meet at a Date Cincy event a little over a year ago. They’ve frequently attended together since (Dan guesses he’s been to about 20).
“ I’ve actually met more guy friends than I have dating opportunities through these events,” Izzy tells me.
“Kind of ironic, but so cool, though,” Dan adds.
Earlier in the evening, I talked with Moore and Braley. While Date Cincy aims to help singles “meet their person IN PERSON,” over the past year, the pair have observed the simultaneous side growth of a new community.
“The primary reason to be here is to find that special someone, hopefully get engaged, get married, whatever you wanna do with your life,” Braley said. “But we also are finding that a lot of people are just coming here for community in general – a consistent social place to go out.”
Meanwhile, LinkedUp Live intentionally facilitates matches that go beyond the romantic; Deshler sees the event as a place for people to also make new friends or business connections (at her December event, she had a table for participants to include their business cards, and the recommended dress code was business casual).
”We all know that the bigger your network is, the more it leads to opportunities,” Deshler said, deeming LinkedUp Live a “forum” for folks who may be looking for a new flame, new job, new friend – or all three.
“ It’s really about just expanding your network, connecting with like-minded singles, and then allowing doors to open as a result,” Deshler said.
Midwestern Lesbian has additionally hosted the frequently sold out “Queer Speed Friending Nights” for the LGBTQ+ community. Ference also points out that during Sapphic Speed Dating, even if participants aren’t feeling a romantic spark, they still have the option to indicate an interest in being friends with the person across from them.
“ It’s just about meeting somebody that’s within your community in a natural way,” Ference said.
The Present Future of Dating
All three organizations plan on continuing their in-person-focused events in the year ahead, although some with a new emphasis on hands-on activities.
LinkUp Live is still finding its footing as a newcomer to the rising in-person matching scene, but in 2026, Deshler envisions events structured around wine tastings, Saturday morning coffee, and hikes.
Date Cincy, which has historically utilized icebreaker activities and conversation cards, is also hosting more activities-based mingles this year to help spur interactions. Upcoming events include duckpin bowling at Pins Mechanical Co., darts at Flight Club, and an “adult field day” at The Fieldhouse in Covington.
“ It’s just that mutual thing to be doing together to make conversation a little bit easier,” Braley explains.
Midwestern Lesbian plans on continuing to refine its roster of single-focused events, including Sapphic Speed Dating for individuals over 40. While their main focus is on the sapphic community, in 2026, they’re looking at hosting singles events for the queer male and trans communities.
Despite varying event formats and target audiences, the in-person scene seems to be generating results. Ference and Dunkley have heard from numerous couples who met at Midwestern Lesbian events and ultimately gotten married. In 2025, Date Cincy saw 6 couples get engaged and 3 tie the knot (that they know of).
But Moore also points out that Cincinnati area singles still successfully connect online. We all likely know at least one pair of high school sweethearts (especially in this town), and none of this is to say that spontaneous meetings at Cincinnati’s many local bars, parks, and more aren’t impossible. While tailored IRL methods may be on the rise, other means aren’t completely on the way out.
Despite being a consistent Date Cincy attendee, Izzy still uses Hinge. There’s a strategy there – he views apps as a “supplement” in a world where the dating landscape continues to evolve on both the in-person and digital fronts. In-person mingles are, ultimately, a modern masterclass in putting yourself out there.
”The more I come to these things, the better and more comfortable I get at talking with people,” Izzy says.
Dan observes that times have changed, necessitating new approaches to finding the one.
”In our society today, especially post-COVID, we’re out of practice in talking to people, and also the rules of dating, per se, have kind of been thrown out the window,” Dan says.
Last winter, I personally found myself impressed by DateCincy – still a relatively young organization at the time – and its place at the forefront of what I once considered a newfangled way of meeting other singles in the city. But ultimately, I didn’t need to pick up a new hobby, download an app, or resort to performative reading at one of our city’s many fine coffee shops. Nor did I need to keep mingling. A few months following the event, a friend unexpectedly asked me out to cocktails at Sundry and Vice. Nine months, and many wonderful Cincinnati dates later, we’re still going strong.
So it could be an algorithm. It could be a meet cute. It could be a melon in your shopping cart at the Hyde Park Kroger signaling you’re in the market for more than fresh produce, according to (debunked) local lore. But, sometimes, maybe this whole modern dating enigma boils down to being at the right place at the right time. And in the Cincinnati area, it seems like there’s an ever-growing list of those right places for singles to be.
This article appears in Feb. 4-17.