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In a year when Cincinnati has seen concerts by a Steve Perry-less Journey and a Jello Biafra-less Dead Kennedys, one upcoming event takes an approach that’s in stark opposition to the “band sans original lead singer” concept. It features a singer without the band he came to fame with. But the twist is that it also features the singer who replaced him when he was booted.
When Sammy Hagar and David Lee Roth announced their upcoming summer tour (stopping at Riverbend on June 4), it seemed like they felt they’d just reunited The Beatles. But, glancing over Riverbend’s upcoming schedule, it is indeed one of the more interesting gigs of the summer. At least these has-beens came up with a good concept for trudging out on the road one more time. Well, maybe their agents did.
The boys have reportedly flipped a coin to decide who closes and who opens the shows. But a better idea would be to simply run the stats and see who is a legit headliner and who is the weakest link. CityBeat ran the duo’s individual career highlights into the computer and came up with a highly scientific analysis of who really is the quintessential Van Halen frontman.
Rumors that Gary Cherone will be working the merchandise booth could not be confirmed by press time.
In this corner …
DLR: “Diamond” David Lee Roth.
Hagar: Sammy “The Red Rocker” Hagar.
Points to: Roth wins the nickname battle by a longshot. Five points.
Previous experience:
DLR: Singer in So Cal bands Red Ball Jets and up-and-comers Mammoth (which morphed into Van Halen).
Hagar: Boxer, singer/guitarist for Montrose.
Points to: Hagar, more for the boxing edge than Montrose. Four points.
Van Halen output:
DLR: 1974-1985. Was on classic albums like the band’s legendary eponymous debut, Women and Children First and Fair Warning. Sang the hits “Running With the Devil,” “Jump” and “Jamie’s Cryin’.”
Hagar: 1985-1996. Came aboard when keyboards became way too prominent and the puns were painful. Is on 5150, OU812 and For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge. Sang the hits “Dreams” and “Right Now.”
Points to: It’s an unfair advantage, but you gotta give it up for the early stuff. Five points to Roth.
VH video performances/ stage presence:
DLR: One of the best live performers in Rock & Roll history. His charisma in videos was strong enough to make you forget the song (which came in handy during some of his solo days).
Hagar: Not a bad front dude in concert, but just blended with the others in videos.
Points to: No contest. Roth gets five points.
Solo output:
DLR: Formed a crack band following his VH departure, featuring Steve Vai and Billy Sheehan. But his biggest solo hits came from the Crazy From the Heat EP (“California Girls,” “Just a Gigolo”), recorded while VH was at their peak.
Hagar: Actually had a very healthy, prolific solo career across three decades. Most known for the hit “I Can’t Drive 55.”
Points to: It’s a close one, but Roth wins by a nose. One point.
Non-musical mischief:
DLR: Arrested for buying weed in a New York City park known by everyone (including the NYPD) as a place to buy weed.
Hagar: Can’t drive the speed limit. Allegedly.
Points to: Roth goes down for stupidity. Four points for Hagar.
Drug of choice:
DLR: What d’ya got? Apparently likes his weed.
Hagar: Owns the popular Cabo Wabo tequila bar in Mexico, has his own line of tequila and had a single called “Mas Tequila.” Also wrote an ode to hash bars called “Amsterdam.”
Points to: Let’s call it a draw. No points.
Heyday Hair:
DLR: Long blonde mane.
Hagar: Big red ‘fro.
Points to: Hagar gets it for originality. Five points.
Stage attire:
DLR: Glitzy scarves and sequins, but he doesn’t limit himself.
Hagar: T-shirts and occasionally red leather pants.
Points to: Roth wins for general rockness. Five points.
Choice quote:
DLR: The most quotable man in Rock. He’s got a million of ’em. Samples: “Money can’t buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it” and “I used to jog, but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.”
Hagar: Ummm …
Points to: Five to Roth.
Was replaced in VH by:
DLR: Sammy Hagar
Hagar: Gary Cherone
Points to: Getting replaced by the guy from Extreme is far worse than getting replaced from the guy from Montrose. Four points to Diamond Dave.
Chances of returning to VH:
DLR: Like a snowball’s in hell.
Hagar: Not good, though he has jammed with other guys from the band not named Eddie.
Points to: Who would want to return to Van Halen? Five points for each of ’em.
AND THE WINNER IS: Roth wins in a third-round knock out.
THE SAM AND DAVE TOUR hits Riverbend on June 4.
This article appears in May 22-28, 2002.