On a recent night, post-snowstorm and pre-yet another, I slipped and slid my way down the icy sidewalks of Main Street in Over-the-Rhine, fighting the urge to look up at the stalactite-size icicles hanging from the fire escapes. I’m on a bar crawl, and I’m looking for something to drink, but this time, I’m being particularly selective. 

It’s Dry January, but the question has been gnawing at me for months — what’s the non-alcoholic scene like in our decidedly bar-filled city? Having moved back to Cincinnati last spring from a college town with an impressive repertoire of booze-free drinks at its many establishments (even despite its party school notoriety), I took advantage of this time of year to explore where Cincinnati lacks in spirit(s).

For this no ‘hol crawl, I chose Main Street in Over-the-Rhine. While I plotted out my crawl in advance, I consciously avoided looking at any menus ahead of time. I also made a rule for myself that, if an establishment had some specialty non-alcoholic drink to offer — even if it wasn’t a house drink — I’d take it. 

I’ll note a few caveats here. I didn’t get to try The Pony, because I simply couldn’t find a place to sit the night I visited. Rudimentary research for an online menu of drinks yielded nothing, so I can’t speak to their non-alcoholic offerings. Mistakes were also made. I didn’t visit Liberty’s Bar & Bottle Shop or LouVino. With the former having “Bottle” in its name and the latter advertising itself as a wine bar, I just didn’t have the guts to go in and ask for something non-alcoholic. While I couldn’t find an online menu for Liberty’s, I subsequently discovered that LouVino has three “Spirits-Free” cocktails on their menu as of Dec. 11, 2024. Lesson learned. 

On the night I embark on this adventure, even in spite of the rough weather, I’m surprised how many bars are veritable ghost towns. In a few places, I’m the only patron, and the colored lights and signs become all the more vibrant as the sugar rush I undergo gradually sinks in. Nevertheless, I half-trudge, half-skate on.

Here’s what I found.

Main Street in Over-the-Rhine. Photo: Hailey Bollinger
Pins Mechanical Co. – My Little Mule ($10) I’m pretty sure I’m the only person in this place who didn’t come to bowl, but that’s okay. There’s a dedicated Dry January menu featuring cocktails both zero-proof and low-proof, and a variety of alcohol-free cans. I note that this Dry January menu is featured just as prominently as the standard cocktail menu. The bartender recommends the 0% ABV My Little Mule, with Lyre’s Dry London, ube, winter citrus and ginger. I don’t register the “ube” listed as part of its ingredients and do a full double-take when the Barney-purple drink arrives, but I love it. The drink is mellow and fruity, but not deathly sweet. It has a nice tart bite to it — think of flat tonic water, but in the best way possible. Photo: Nadya Ellerhorst
Japp’s – Beehive Jive ($13) At Japp’s, non-alcoholic selections are included as part of the regular menu, with two house cocktails. Here, the bartender suggests the Beehive Jive: CleanCo non-alcoholic gin, chai, honey, pineapple, lemon juice and orange blossom water. The mix of sweet honey and crisp pineapple in the Beehive Jive is a delightful combination made all the better by the drink’s overarchingly creamy flavor. It has numerous distinct things going on at once, but it works. Photo: Nadya Ellerhorst
The Setback – Can of O’Doul’s ($4) Here, I’m given two options by the bartender – a can of O’Doul’s or a soda. I have no idea what it is, but I go for the O’Doul’s. It’s your rudimentary non-alcoholic beer — in other words, very basic flavor-wise. As someone honestly not that into beer of any ABV, I do not enjoy it. By absolutely no fault of the establishment, this drink sets me back. But so as to not insult the kind bartender, who had no involvement in the brewing, I manage to drink about half of it. Next time, I will go with a soda. Photo: Nadya Ellerhorst
Alice – How Do You Like Them Apples ($9) Alice has a non-alcoholic section to its menu, with two cocktails and a variety of canned options, including three drinks from Untitled Art and Red Bull (“Hold the vodka!”). I go for the How Do You Like Them Apples (and I still regret not ordering it in the manner of Matt Damon). The blend of apple juice, lemon, maple syrup and salted caramel syrup feels like drinking a caramel apple. It’s a simple, familiar flavor, but it’s effective, and despite being iced, it’s a very cozy drink. A row of Seedlip Non-Alcoholic Spirits catches my eye from behind the bar, and while I don’t ask, I wonder if the bartenders here can just make a variety of mocktails to order. The empty dance floor gives me even greater pause — with no people, Alice feels like some discotheque liminal space. Photo: Nadya Ellerhorst
“The Show Must Go On,” by Killian Baarlaer and Brent Stroud May 31 issue As Greater Cincinnati music venues finally returned back to normal operations for the first time since the height of the Covid pandemic, CityBeat music writers Killian Baarlaer and Brent Stroud spoke with large and small venues about how they’ve managed to bounce back from Covid-related challenges. Unlike other major cities, Cincinnati did not lose a single independent venue as a result of the Covid pandemic. Instead, against all odds, two new music venues opened in Cincinnati directly following the height of the pandemic — MegaCorp Pavilion and the Andrew J Brady Music Center. In the aftermath of the pandemic, venues are still facing several unique obstacles to success, including rising artist fees, increased customer demand and, on the flip side, hesitancy from some customers who aren’t fully comfortable yet with attending large in-person events. Photo: Aidan Mahoney
Mr. Pitiful’s – Nada (No money spent) The bartender was upfront — they have nothing. Not even a can of fake beer (at this point, I’m honestly a bit relieved). They offer to improvise, which I appreciate, but getting a tad concerned about my blood sugar levels, I declined. Photo: facebook.com/MrPitifulsOTR
Wiseguy Lounge – “The Tumbler” ($8) When I ask for something sans booze, the bartender is honest with me — they have a mocktail menu (it rotates seasonally), but they have a limited amount of necessary ingredients on hand, and they wouldn’t recommend the one they’re in a position to make. They do offer to make me an unlisted one they’ve been working on. Secret menu item unlocked! Not one to turn down the chance to be a mixology guinea pig, I accept. “The Tumbler,” named after an unfortunate patron who fell down the bar’s stairs after a particularly productive night (he’s fine), contains Seedlip, lemon juice, “spicy grapefruit cordial” and ginger syrup. As a grapefruit lover, I’ve been waiting all night for a drink featuring my choice citrus. The drink is a perfect level of sweet — no bitterness — kept in check by the ginger, whose mild, spicy bite arrives fashionably late. It’s ideal for the winter weather. If you visit, ask Harrison to make you one. Photo: Nadya Ellerhorst