HOT: What Would GG Text?
You know how there are times when you want to text someone that you feel like defecating in public and bashing your head in with a microphone until it bleeds, but you just don’t have time to type all of that out? Now, thanks to a new set of GG Allin-themed emojis, it’s easier than ever. The emojis were created to be representative of the debauched legacy of Allin, the most outrageous and controversial Punk artist of all time. Things don’t get too repulsive — iTunes wouldn’t sell the set if there was a “microphone shoved in anus” one — but there is a “chocolate”-covered banana (a toned-down reference to a stunt similar to the microphone incident) and a headstone emblazoned with “Scumfuc.”
WARM: No Thanks for the Mammaries
In an interesting twist of karma, Tim Lambesis, singer for Christian Metal band As I Lay Dying, is growing boobs. The vocalist is serving a six-year jail sentence for attempting to hire someone to murder his wife. Part of Lambesis’ defense was that his steroid use had caused his erratic behavior. In jail, Lambesis suffered side effects from steroid withdraw, including enlarged breasts. He is suing the medical staff at the jail for depriving him of the medication he was prescribed to fight the side effects, asking for a mere $35 million for his suffering.
COLD: Misfits No More
Jerry Only of legendary Punk band Misfits was super psyched the group reunited for a couple of festival gigs recently. In interviews he talked about the band touring and making a new album, even telling Alternative Press he felt the band currently has “the potential to be the biggest band ever.” But singer Glenn Danzig, who has done well as a solo artist, apparently doesn’t see a huge market for elderly guys singing spooky Punk songs in skull makeup. He told The New York Times the reunion is over and that he highly doubted a new Misfits album would ever happen.
This article appears in Sep 28 – Oct 5, 2016.