Move over, Coco-T, I have a new idol from reality television land. Joan Koplan from AMC’s new show, Small Town Security, is a gem. The docu-series follows a family-owned private security company headed by Joan, the "Chief" and her husband, "Captain" Irwin Koplan. Joan sought super-stardom her entire life, but ended up settling as a wife and security officer when her Hollywood dreams hit a dead-end. In Small Town Security, Joan is a foul-mouthed, porn-loving, cigar-chomping fireball, complete with a devilish sidekick, Lambchop the Chihuahua. It sounds ridiculous, which it is, but it's about time reality TV acknowledged its own absurdity. Catch up on episodes here. Congrats, Joan, you're a celebrity to at least one person!
Combining the Earth's greatest elements: Beyonce, Snuggies and killer video editing, this masterpiece by Ton Do-Nguyen is one of the best Internet bits I’ve seen in a while and, considering my digital consumption, that’s saying a lot. Check out his version of “Love on Top,” and compare to Beyonce’s original here (yeah, it’s spot-on, too). Don't worry, Bey gives her blessing.
Finally, a guide to getting your Glamour Shots on-point.
Some people knew about Chick-fil-A’s Christian background before last week, including RuPaul’s Drag Race alum, Willam Belli (and anyone who ever tried to get some waffle fries on a Sunday). Let’s revisit this dragtastic look at chicken politics, with a dash of Wilson Philips:
Celebrities are just like us! New York photographer Danny Evans waves his magic Photoshop wand over photos of famous people to make them look normal and frumpy. Two words: Fat Kanye.
There’s a point in every person’s life when it seems like everyone else is reproducing. For some, digital baby books on Facebook can serve as a constant reminder of mortality or send a woman’s biological clock into overdrive. Or maybe you’re just like, “Hey, I’d rather not see a newborn covered in birth goo at 9 a.m.” Regardless, most of us can agree that babies in newsfeeds need to be stopped. Enter unbaby.me, a Chrome app that replaces all Facebook kid photos with those of cats. While kitties are the default, users can change their preferences to replace tiny human pics with photos of anything more pleasant.
I love me some Lena Dunham and Girls, but this spoof by PeterFrankMike is too good.
Something tells me the ladies would appreciate the satire. Besides, don't most famous people have famous parents? And for the record, I would totally watch Boys.
