Coconut Oil: Natural Lifestyle Staple or Literal Poison?
A Harvard professor last week gave an educational talk about the dangers of nature’s lubricant: coconut oil. The ingredient has gained mainstream popularity in the States and beyond in recent years, being used as a healthier alternative to other fats and oils. But this prof called coconut oil “pure poison,” citing its high levels of saturated fatty acids.
Don’t go spitting out your smoothie quite yet. Some were quick to clap back about how coconut oil has been both a beauty and food staple in many cultures for centuries and is totally fine in moderation. What, like Americans are alarmist and take trends too far? Never heard of it.
The Saga of Elon Musk, Azealia Banks and Grimes
Elon Musk is the billionaire founder of Tesla and SpaceX (see: a recent emotional rollercoaster of an interview with The New York Times). Azealia Banks is a controversial New York rapper (see: multiple online and IRL flights with celebs and regulars alike; her blood-stained chicken-sacrificing closet). Grimes is a tiny goth alien bringing dreamy Synth-Pop music to this universe (see: her 2012 album Visions. No shade, it’s just a good record). Where do the three intersect? We all learned over the past couple weeks.
There’s no obvious reason why these three would star in a real-life soap opera via the news, but that’s just what happened after Banks flew out to Musk’s home to collaborate on a song with his girlfriend Grimes (and yes, it’s weird that Musk and Grimes are a thing, but we have to keep this moving). Banks posted on Instagram, claiming that she was left alone in the Mansion That Tesla Built for days waiting for Grimes (which sounds like my dream scenario). Banks later went on to provide even more juicy details, like accusing Musk of tweeting on acid (which might explain his whole post about making Tesla private at $420 a share, which scared investors and caused the stock to drop), making fun of his and Grimes’ appearance, screenshots of Grimes’ texts to her that detail Musk’s big dick and how she got him into weed, racism allegations, the idea that the couple brought Banks in for a weird threesome — the list goes on.
Now, Tesla is remaining public, Musk and Grimes may have broken up and Banks is pulling out the apology card for dragging Musk into the hot mess spotlight. The drama seems to have simmered for now, but as long as Banks has Instagram access, the next public beef is just around the corner. I’ll keep the popcorn warm.
The VMAs (Very Mediocre Awards)
MTV’s Video Music Awards aired last week, offering yet another opportunity for many of us to feel old. As I watched the 35th annual show, I couldn’t help but (channel Carrie Bradshaw and) wonder: “Have I even ever heard a Shawn Mendes song?” “How do you pronounce Camila Cabello?” “What’s a Post Malone?”
Cardi B opened the show with a baby reveal fake-out that turned out to be a “Moon Person” award statue wrapped in a blankie. As if she was gonna introduce her newborn to the world at the freakin’ VMAs — where’s the check in that? Cardi makes money moves. The rapper had quite the night, taking the most awards (three), tied with Childish Gambino.
But don’t worry if you’re feeling totally out of touch — the VMAs delivered plenty of nostalgia, too. Jennifer Lopez performed all her hits from the past 20 years, including those with Ja Rule, as boyfriend of the year Alex Rodriguez looked on in meme-worthy amazement. JLo was honored with the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award, the VMAs’ lifetime achievement — the first Latin artist to win the award.
It was announced that pseudo-reality hit The Hills would be getting a reboot featuring O.G. cast members like Heidi and Spencer (with their unfortunately named baby Gunner), Audrina, Justin Bobby and more (but, unsurprisingly, no Kristin or L.C.) Aerosmith surprised everyone by joining the Post Malone/21 Savage performance, looking like some animated skeletons (aka they fit right in).
But the most surreal moment of the night came from Madonna, who iconically performed “Like a Virgin” at the first-ever VMAs in 1984. Madonna came out looking like a wannabe fortune teller left in the desert since last year’s Burning Man to give a tribute to our dearly departed Queen Aretha Franklin. Only…she basically just talked about herself?
She rambled on about moving to New York with a few bucks in her pocket, living in a crack house, being mistaken for a prostitute and being extremely unprofessional at an audition… where she sung “You Make Me Feel” and launched her career. Show a little respect when you get home, Madge!
Perhaps pandering to the aging MTV audience isn’t the best bet: It was the least-watched VMAs of all time.
Stunt Queen Invites Dozens on Date for ‘Social Experiment’
I’ve never used a dating app because I’m ancient and met my person the old-fashioned way (on a singles chat line). But recently dozens of New York men found themselves in a similar boat: waiting on a Tinder date to meet them in Union Square. It turned out they were all waiting on the same woman who’d given them all the same instructions. She soon took the stage in the park and directed the dudes to compete for a date, “swiping” left and right in person. The sham turned out to be a social experiment produced by a viral filmmaker to expose the truth behind online dating. As if there’s anyone alive who doesn’t realize modern dating is a shitshow. I think I’ll stick to Bachelor in Paradise, thankyouverymuch.
Contact T.C. Britton: letters@citybeat.com
This article appears in Aug 22-29, 2018.
