Here's an Excellently Odd List of Things 'Prominent Cincinnatians Would Appreciate for Christmas' from 1899

This weird collection of things people wanted was published in the Dec. 24, 1899 issue of "The Cincinnati Enquirer" and includes polar bears, tin cups and the "annexation of Cincinnati to Norwood"

Dec 2, 2019 at 10:03 am
click to enlarge Barney Kroger - Photo: krogerstories.com
Photo: krogerstories.com
Barney Kroger

Sometimes, perusing historical newspapers yields fascinating and odd nuggets of information. One such example is this article: "Some Things That Some Prominent Cincinnatians Would Appreciate for Christmas," published in the Dec. 24, 1899 edition of The Cincinnati Enquirer.

It is literally just a list of of names with a wished-for item next to each.

And while it seems to strictly consist of "prominent" dudes (although Rookwood Pottery founder Maria Longworth Nichols Storer was alive and had already created the nation's first female-led major manufacturer at the time this was published), it is highly entertaining regardless of the sexism. A couple of names are even still recognizable today, including:

  • B.H. Kroger, aka Bernard "Barney" Henry Kroger, founder of Kroger, who wanted "a few steel doors."
  • Julius Fleischmann, a former Cincinnati mayor and the son of the founder of Fleishmann's Yeast, Charles Louis Fleischmann, who wanted "more honest racing."
  • Chas. Wiedemann, of the Wiedemann Brewing Co., who wanted a "new bottling building."
  • George Wiedemann, founder of the Wiedemann Brewing Co., who wanted "many orders from Europe for the tinfoil remover."
  • Nicholas Longworth, a politician, former Speaker of the United States House of Representatives and grandson of famed Cincinnati winemaker Nicholas Longworth I, who wanted a "demand for light manufacturing buildings."
  • And Andrew Jergens, founder of the Andrew Jergens Company/Jergens Soap Company, who concerningly wanted "the contract to wash a few African tribes."

Lots of these men wanted to grow an inch or two, win some kind of sporting or betting event and quite a few wanted to sing better. There's also one wants the "corner on polar bears," whatever that means. Here's the rest of the list, in case you were wondering what the likes of R.M. Bishop wanted. (Spoiler: It's a tin cup.)

  • R.M. Bishop — Just a tin cup.
  • W.T. Irwin — P. and G. at 500.
  • Peter Gibson — Rifle bull's-eye.
  • C.H. Rowe — A golfing record.
  • Charles Maish — A new factory.
  • Wm. Deppe — Pol Plancon's voice.
  • B.H. Kroger — A few steel doors. 
  • C.C. Taylor — John H.'s assurance.
  • Henry Wiborg — No. 4 1/2 kid gloves.
  • John A. Noone — Pete Dunne's style.
  • J.S. Monroe — About one more foot.
  • Henry Cain — Another Oyster Trust.
  • Fred A. Smith — The ability to stick.
  • Chas. Harrison — A thorough jumper.
  • Hiram De Camp — Morris's coolness.
  • H.C. Hoefinghoff — To drill and drill.
  • Chas. H. Jacobs — Sunny sides in life.
  • W.M. Perin — Speed for Sorin's gait.
  • Chas. G. Hall — Ad writer to the king.
  • Charles Walter Bell — A few trim mines.
  • Ed Baylie — A few more new delicacies.
  • J.W. Bullock — Motors used in Africa.
  • Ren. Brunswick — More hours for work.
  • Frank F. Wiborg — No more ink trusts.
  • W.H. Harrison — The right to rise often.
  • Thomas Greene — Al Loper's high tones.
  • W.H. Burtner — The latest warm story.
  • George D. Potts — A crowd to the door.
  • J.E. Holland — A Ten Broeck to saddle.
  • W.D. Henry — Anything in the brass line.
  • Julius Fleischmann — More honest racing.
  • Stanley King — A fortune for the heiress.
  • E.V. Wilbern — A corner on polar bears.
  • Norman Guernsey Kenan — Arctic nights.
  • S.W. Skinner — A good smoke consumer.
  • Dick Lewis — The best of Glass Trust.
  • Burten Hellister — The golf championship.
  • Chester F. Korn — More room for lumber. 
  • George Haydock — More gentleman racers.
  • J. Geo. Jung — A few more hours in the day. 
  • I.B. Reakirt — The billiard championship.
  • Nat Henchman Davis — Well wishes for all.
  • C.B. Ryan — The ethics of possum hunting.
  • George M. Verity — To roof the whole land.
  • Joe Trevor — A plan to harness our speed.
  • Harry Burton — A range in Windsor Castle.
  • W.D. Breed — Another year like the past one.
  • Frank M. Whittaker — More freight steamers.
  • H.G. Foulds — The true sportsman's stomach.
  • George McDuffle — Price Hill's bowling record.
  • Charles Stewart — A rush for Woolper Avenue.
  • E.A. Donnelly — A few studies in quiet life.
  • Chas. Wiedemann — A new bottling building.
  • J.B. Keys — More new homes on the East Hill.
  • Fred Geier — A prize for cleanliness in factory.
  • H.F. Woods — Automobile line to East Hill.
  • Cal H. Jones — A new ritual for the Capon Club.
  • Jefferson Livingstone — A two-minute roadster. 
  • F.D. Comstock — Just a little black in the hair.
  • Charles O. Hall — Less sprockets; more safes.
  • J.B. Scotts — The best wishes of the bachelors.
  • S.G. Sullivan — Kingsbury's receipt for a smile.
  • Charles Hinsch — The three-million deposit mark.
  • Thomas Walsh — Orator to the Railroad Club.
  • G. Guckenberger — The Mayoralty of Westwood.
  • W.W. Goode — Presidency of the Candy Trust.
  • W.C. Herron — The latest Rough Rider swing.
  • W.C. Lawson — The head of the Tin Trust.
  • Tyler Field — Just a few more inches in height.
  • John Omwake — Continuous whist tournaments.
  • F.J. Wade — A site for a theater on Race Street.
  • Al Schwill — A demand for glass pocket pistols.
  • Chas. O. Rose — Stamina in its own clubhouse.
  • John H. Bold — The rebuilding of Blenheim Castle.
  • Joe Ryan — Soapmaker to the King of Dahomey.
  • Dan Hemingray — The Glass Trust's best wishes.
  • Walker Hall — The grocery stores in the Soudan.
  • C.W. Tomlinson — Official choirster for the Capons.
  • Frank M. Witte — Official pie maker to Kruger.
  • E.B. Stanley — More factories on Colerain Avenue.
  • Francis Bacon James — Streaks of lean and fat.
  • H.D. Crane — The amateur baseball championship.
  • F.H. Simpson — A trunk line through College Hill.
  • Warren Lynch — Just a little speedier roadster.
  • Nicholas Walsh — More Ned Whites for the country.
  • Thomas Stone — Well, a good-sized hardwood log.
  • Stanley Withrow — Just ordinary office practice.
  • Max Fleischmann — The broadsword championship.
  • Charles H. Shaw — The eloquence of a Disraeli.
  • H.H. Suydam — The contract to fence the Transvaal.
  • Fred Mackentepe — Plain, ordinary run of quietness.
  • R.P. Buchanan — A good line of self-consciousness.
  • Robert Reynolds — A pipe of peace for the Ice Trust.
  • C.E. Prior — Annexation of Cincinnati to Norwood.
  • Rook Laidley — Excitement on the river to Louisville.
  • Henry Burkhold — Society to locate on Delta Avenue.
  • Dawson Blackmore, Jr. — Piano maker to the Queen.
  • Tom Grayden — The Captaincy of the Harvard Team.
  • George E. Rockwell — More G.A.R. worlds to conquer.
  • Will Lemmon — Cradles or any old thing in that line. 
  • Joe C. Richards — Just another year in New York.
  • Stanley M. Lawson — Another story on the brass plant.
  • C.C. Bragg — The automobile line through Beechwood.
  • Arthur Le Boutillier — A few medallions for the royalty.
  • R.A. Holden, Jr. — Presidency of the Dried Fruit Trust.
  • Bayard Kilgour — A harness for the electric current.
  • Charles Hofer — The hustle and bustle of business life.
  • George G. Johnson — Orders for the F.R.V. two-step.
  • R.P. Ernst — Continued Republican gains in Kentucky.
  • Isaac N. Jordan — The true inwardness of marital bliss.
  • W.A. Maue — The Prince's endorsement on the dress suit.
  • Davis C. Anderson — A challenge for the America Cup.
  • C.H.M. Atkins — The elevators in the World's Fair.
  • Lee Cleary — Anything within the gift of the L. and N.
  • Harry E. Meyers — Partridge hams in the English army.
  • E.B. Piepho — Just a few longer hairs in the mustache.
  • A.W. Schell — The bowling record of the Avondale Club.
  • Charles F. Barrett — A rest after holiday package rush.
  • Carl F. Lunkenheiner — Oil cups on all flying machines.
  • O. Armleder — An order for wagons from the Transvaal.
  • Jim Hutton — A night school for some of the would-bees.
  • George Ingalls — A new vein of smokeless now and then.
  • Charlie Howe — More Germans to lead — dances, not men.
  • Austin Smith — A right green vest with Raymond spots.
  • Al Trevor — The steady tread of a dry goods magnate.
  • John McCormick Gibson — Insight into the billiard maneuvers.
  • A.H. Singer — A long snooze at Norwood after tomorrow.
  • Augustus Burnwell Trum — Opposition in the coal business.
  • Dr. A. Zeckendorf — Official smoke consumer for the city.
  • Andrew Jergens — A contract to wash a few African tribes.
  • Richard McComas — A clue to the gang that stole the wire.
  • Fabius Lawson — A nice, stout boy for the lawn next summer.
  • George Harris — A dictionary, with nothing but large words.
  • John Hanna — Captaincy of the Avondale Club's baseball nine.
  • F.B. Ellis — The Athletic Club with its own symphony orchestra.
  • Charless Gelifus — Official performer to the President of France.
  • E.H. Pendleton — More Harvard dinners for more monologues.
  • W.W. Granger — A renomination to the Board of Legislation.
  • Herman Duhne — Nothing but Hartwell's bowling championship.
  • J.V.B. Scarborough — A full line of dwellings on Wold Avenue.
  • Wm. Von Steinwehr — A listerner to my story of the Boer War.
  • Thomas B. Paxton, Jr. — The command of a Rough Rider company.
  • Vachel Anderson — No disturbances of any kind — just plain quietude.
  • George Warrington — Presidency of the National Flower Show.
  • Nicholas Longworth — A demand for light manufacturing buildings.
  • George W. Johnstone — A new line of eloquence for policy seekers.
  • William Henry Davis, Jr. — The public confidence in the lamp chimney.
  • B.B. Quillian — Long distance telephone to Russia to take care of orders.
  • James Morrison — The first ride on the street car up Middleton Avenue.
  • Theodore Dohrman — The Clifton Golf Club's individual championship.
  • George Wiedemann — Many orders from Europe for the tinfoil remover.
  • George S. Rally — The true romance of hunting on the Chesapeake Bay. 
  • Frank Ballman — The true way to manage and get together a baseball nine.