Margarita Madness At The Purple People Bridge : May 17th

Guest Commentary: Ohio Parents, Stay in your Own Lane: the Kids are Queering Prom

The prom king and queen crowning in Kettering, Ohio, stirred up some Stephen King-type memories for one LGBTQ+ Ohioan.

Jul 24, 2023 at 11:00 am

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Photo by: Lena Glukhova, Pexels

The crowning of two gender-fluid students as prom king and queen at Fairmont High School in Kettering, Ohio, has stirred up some drama.

This guest commentary was originally published by the Buckeye Flame and republished here with permission.

I struggled with my sexuality and gender in a public high school where no one was out. When I agreed to attend prom with a guy friend, I feared a Carrie prom experience. Like many fellow Gen-Xers, I cut my teeth on Stephen King novels during a time when bullying meant traumatizing people for their differences with humiliation, broken bones and concussions.

My long-dormant Carrie fears stirred up recently when Fairmont High School students in Kettering, Ohio, elected two gender-fluid students, Rosita Green and Dai’sean Conley, as prom king and queen, respectively. In the days that followed, a group of angry parents raged against the school for allowing the students’ choice to stand.

My own prom experience turned out to be lovely and free of any bucket-of-blood moments. But it’s hard to have the night of your life when your true self is hidden beneath layers of patriarchy and homophobia.

I thought of Carrie White again when I read some of the parents’ responses from those who opposed the crowning at a board of education meeting held on May 2. According to the Dayton Daily News, parent Joe Overholser told the board: “I’m concerned about what’s going on in the schools. I’m concerned about normalizing the idea of questioning gender.”

A woman at the meeting said the school board should “write a policy requiring prom-court candidates to run from a position linked to their biological sex. Schools harm children when they play along with this charade … what Kettering allowed to happen at prom is normalizing something that isn’t normal.”

The meeting wasn’t the end of it. On May 3, in response to the prom court selection, someone called Kettering Fairmont High School and issued a threat against all students who identify as LGBTQ+. Hours later, the call was traced to Brandon Moore of Beavercreek, Ohio, who was arrested and charged with inducing panic and threatening violence.

Disappearing voices

Such hateful rhetoric points to a larger problem in our schools. LGBTQ+ voices are disappearing from our classrooms and libraries. The Republican attorney general of Louisiana, Jeff Landry, recently proposed legislation to limit children and teens access to books with sexual content. According to the Associated Press article “School Library Book Bans are Seen as Targeting LGBTQ Content,” Landry’s February report “listed nine books his office considers ‘sexually explicit’ or inappropriate for children. Seven have LGBTQ storylines.” Similar efforts are happening in other states.

Support makes a difference

After Fairmont High School’s prom, Dai’Sean Conley posted on Instagram, “I hope everyone had fun @ my coronation ☺ but seriously, I am beyond grateful for the support I have received this past month.”

In a private message, Conley said the greatest memory was “hugging my aunt as she cried when I had come down from the balcony after being crowned.” Conley told reporters there were boos during the crowning, followed by some hurtful messaging on social media. Since prom night, however, both Conley and Rosita Green have focused on the positive. Green told the Dayton Daily News, “There’s always someone out there with similar experiences as you so you’re never really alone.”

And these kids weren’t alone in their journey. Outside that same school meeting, about 40 LGBTQ+ supporters rallied along Shroyer Road with Pride gear and signs. A rally organizer said the event, which included supportive parents as well as students, was designed to be “louder than the hate inside” the board meeting.

Final verdict? The students kept their crowns. Kettering City School District stated the process of voting is 100% student-led. Kettering Board of Education President Toby Henderson said, “I don’t think there is any motivation—as far as I’m aware of—to have a discussion at the school board level. I don’t expect we’ll be taking that up.”

In other words, go home angry parents. Stay in your own lane. Respect the students’ decision, your children’s decision, of who best represents their senior class. Students deserve to have their own high school prom experience free of parental control.

Leave the traumatic bullying culture of Carrie in the past. Bravery and support are the story of today.