Margarita Madness At The Purple People Bridge : May 17th

Paper or Plastic: How Many Times Can Regina George Get Hit By That Bus?

I wouldn’t go as far to say Mean Girls defined a generation, but it teetered on something close. And now, 20 years later, the morning bell is back in theaters.

Jan 12, 2024 at 11:44 am

New student Cady Heron (Angourie Rice) is welcomed into the top of the social food chain by the elite group of popular girls at North Shore High called “The Plastics.” Photo: Paramount Pictures

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Since we’re back in class – again – how about a little Mean Girls history lesson?

Get in, loser.

First, there was the 2002 New York Times bestselling book “Queen Bees and Wannabes,” which served as the inspiration for the 2004 hit film Mean Girls which then served as the inspiration for the Broadway musical of the same name which then then served as the inspiration for today’s movie-musical of – you guessed it – the same name. What’s next? A musical inspired by the movie inspired by the musical inspired by the book?

Whew! Might need SparkNotes to pass this class.

That was my initial thought before returning to North Shore High School. But then I considered this: It’s not completely fair to condemn a creative retelling on the surface. We see it everywhere across various media. And I supposed I shouldn’t get critical if it means I get to relive something as iconic as “The Plastics."

Think about it. How many times do we hear one-liners from that classic film starring Lindsay Lohan? “You can’t sit with us!” “Is butter a carb?” “Boo, you whore.”

I wouldn’t go as far to say Mean Girls (2004) defined a generation, but it teetered on something close.

And now, 20 years later, the morning bell is back in theaters – ambitiously and bravely – with a new musical soundtrack and plenty of the same jokes.

Yes, for the most part, the same jokes.

The stale predictability was something I struggled to shake. It felt like eating a stale Pop-Tart from the age of LiveStrong bracelets and Lost. Admittedly, I haven’t seen the Broadway show. But I wonder if I would’ve been more forgiving of the jokes while in an orchestra seat. Listening to “fetch” once again on the big screen was underwhelming.

Speaking again of history, Theodore Roosevelt famously said: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” While it’s unlikely the 26th U.S. President wore pink on Wednesdays, I do think he would’ve felt this remake encroached on something sacred.

While sitting in the theater, I found myself wondering the same things I wondered in third period algebra at Elder High School: “Why am I here?” “Is this really necessary?” and “Is my cell phone actually on silent?”

Was the soundtrack good? Sure, it was alright. Was the ensemble cast talented? Sure, but nobody really stood out. Was it fun to watch? Sure, but mostly for nostalgia.

Mostly because the film made me want to revisit the original.

Don’t get me wrong: the message of Mean Girls is timeless. The lyrics underscore those (albeit tired) themes rather well. Plus, the media blitz could expose new, younger generations to the story many of us know and love. That isn’t lost on me.

However, all in all, we already had this film. And the musical numbers weren’t dynamic enough to trigger a millionth version of Mean Girls. The songs and dances probably should’ve remained on stage where the story hadn’t yet been told.

Keep in mind, 2004 was long before #MeToo. We’re now in the era of Greta Gerwig’s Barbie. And dare I say we’re in need of fresher, more modern approaches to feminism, equality, the young adult experience and – to be honest – comedy? (No, taking out a few problematic references and adding a cameo appearance by Gay TikTok’s Chris Olsen doesn’t count.)

Unless there is something really unique and relevant to add to the conversation, my message to the Mean Girls creators is this: The limit does exist.

Watch the Mean Girls trailer below: