Insults That Only Make Sense in Cincinnati
Cincinnati is a world unto itself, and with that world comes a language only Cincinnnatians can speak — and insults that only a Cincinnatian can be deeply wounded by.
Like, if someone were to call you boring, that may hurt a little. But if someone says that being stuck in rush-hour traffic on the Brent Spence Bridge is more enjoyable than your company, well, it's time for some introspection. Or a fight.
If it comes down to a fight, we've collected some of the best Cincinnati-specific insults you can use the next time your mouth wants to write checks that your a** can't cash.
Photo: twitter.com/bengals
"Your mom catches more balls than Ja’Marr Chase."
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Photo: Provided by Skyline
"Your chili is watery."
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Photo: Google Maps
"Parking at Kenwood Mall on a Saturday is more enjoyable than being around you."
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Photo: Ron Valle
"You're more of a disaster than the Reds' last season."
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"You're probably a Steelers fan."
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Photo: butlersheriff.org
"You’re dumber than Richard Jones’ mustache."
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Photo: Katherine Barrier
"You’re more of a jabroni than Aftab."
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Photo: Russell Bickel//CC BY-SA 4.0
"I’d rather sit through a Crossroads service than listen to you."
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2022 Google Maps
"You're trashier than The Banks at 2 a.m."
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Photo: Snaks, Flickr Creative Commons
"You suck at cornhole."
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Photo: Kjunstorm, Wikimedia Commons
"You're faker than Pete Rose's apology."
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Photo: City of Cincinnati
"You’re about as stable as the Western Hills Viaduct."
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Photo: Hamilton County Livestream
"You’re as dead inside as Joe Deters."
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Photo: Nick Swartsell
"You’re more of a letdown than Cincinnati's subway."
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Photo: Facebook.com/LaRosasPizzeria
"You have the personality of a LaRosa’s pizza crust."
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Photo: Formula One, Wikimedia Commons
"I'd rather be stuck on I-75 during rush hour than be anywhere near you."
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"You’re about as original as a mustache at Collective Espresso."
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"The Brent Spence Bridge is more reliable than you."
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Photo: 3CDC
"You’re as annoying as a 3CDC sign."
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